Sunday, December 21, 2008

Resistance is Futile

I want you to close your eyes...wait! Do not do that. You cannot read my blog with closed eyes. Ugh...okay, go get a friend, husband, kid, anybody. Ask them to read you this entry while you close your eyes. Problem yoxdur.

Now, visualize getting out of your nice warm bed, sleep fuzzing your brain.

Visualize the frustration of knowing that first cup of çay is still 30 minutes away (water needs to boil, tea needs to steep, etcetera, etcetera).

Visualize clumsily making your way to the washroom where you...uhm...get to work.

Now, visualize your hand wrapping around cold steel. You turn a knob and the sharpest prick of cold water, followed by thousands of similarly intense pricks hitting your...well, you get it.

Visualize the realization that you really don’t need that çay to wake up.

Ah, I am really diggin’ this cultural assimilation thing.